newness

With a refreshed newness I have begun to do some soul searching, hopefully to move me forward in this journey of life God has for me. For far too long I have compartmentalized my life and failed to see how "spiritual" it all is. As I have been reading a lot of Jewish material lately convinced that to fully understand a lot of my views in Christianity I need to understand the roots especially in mindset of where that faith comes from. Jewish scholars, rabbis and mystics don't compartmentalize spiritual and secular there is just LIFE all lived w/ a mindset that God is present in and through it all. This view is really helping me not to feel so ashamed for not being "in ministry" or "active" in a local church at the moment. Shame is a big problem I am realizing especially for me.

I realized that I have never actually blogged about my running and working out even though those are huge aspects of my life. Probably has something to do w/ shame again, not wanting to appear so unspiritual as to blog about anything other than God and family. What a crock. Running is one of the most spirtiual things I do. I am alone in creation w/ the Creator and enjoying it. Or I am fellowshiping w/ some of my closest friends or strolling my beautiful daughter around the neighborhood. How is that not just as important as all the other questionings and junk I blog about? Hopefully I am beginning at 32 alomost 33 to get a clue! SOOOOOOO....

Saturday is the BIG race at least the big one for me. I have been training and looking forward to this 1/2 marathon for some time now. I want to finish in under 2:30 but will see. That would be 19 minutes better than Country Music in April. We should have much better conditions Saturday! I am more nervous than I have ever been for a race. I want so badly to do well. I have been nursing various aches and pains phsically and mentally for over a month. SO in some ways this taper week is nice but I am just edgey about losing the "edge" and not being sharp, crisp come Saturday morning. I am also excited that when the race is over I am going to drive to W.TN for 3 days of deer hunting. Muzzleloader means I can kill either sex and put meat in the freezer for friends and myself. THat is why I hunt to put food on the table and the commarderie of being w/ my dad. Sometimes I feel he and I share so little in common that hunting keeps us close. It really did before Lily came along. Now everyone seems closer if not only b/c we all feel so blessed to have her and love her so very much! I am also looking forward to Sat. b/c I am planning on taking the rest of November and part of December off from training, at least running so long. I plan on more time in the gym w/ crossfit and gym jones type stuff and shorter more speed sessions or just easy runs couple times a week. Less schedule have to do this today kind of training. I've already started that to a degree including a modified "cindy" from crossfit brandX today 12 minutes: 3 pullups, 6 pushups, 9 squats. I completed 11 rounds plus 3 chins. Huffing, puffing and trashed at the end. Loved it!!! Wish me luck!!